It has obviously been awhile since my last post, and as I'm approaching my second-to-last final exams (maybe ever), I have naturally become a little more reflective. The purpose of this blog was to keep everyone updated on my travels, or at least thoughts while traveling. I didn't think I'd write much when I returned, because honestly, there's not too many things exciting about Oxford, Miss. Maybe in my eyes or some of my friends, but in the bigger scheme of things, I'm in a bubble.
But it's times like these that I realize a lot of what is to be learned about life is in places like Oxford. This semester I've learned more about people - their generosity, their tenacity, and their courage, but also about their hollowness, their greed, and their sense of entitlement. I've been trying to think about my undergraduate years in a 'big picture' sense, which is very strange to me right now. It will never be irrelevant, but it is so peculiar to me how much I've learned at a very small, but very special place, in just four years.
I've always said I've learned both good and bad from Ole Miss. Let me tell you, both the good and the bad multiplied ferociously this semester. As one was revealed in someone or something, so was the other. I'm the type of person that likes to see more good than bad, but I also know that sometimes it takes bad to see good. But, as I'm constantly reminded, things, in general, could always be a lot worse.
I guess what I'm trying to say is I've had a heck of a semester. I don't think I really have all that much to show for how I've grown (not physically, unfortunately). I've seen how love is not forever, and much one's capability to truly love is directly correlated to their relationship with God. I've seen people give from the bottom of their hearts. I've had parents basically adopt me this semester. I've seen what family and friends really mean to Southerners. I've seen death take its ugly toll on people who had barely yet lived. I've seen girls at their sweetest and girls at their cattiest. I've seen myself learn true forgiveness, but I've also seen myself develop some callousness. I now know what it's like to break bridges, but make up for it by building multiple newer, stronger ones. I know how important it is to be genuinely thoughtful, only because of the way people think of me. I've learned that my parents have actually stopped calling me out on my mistakes, which is one step closer to what I deem the 'real world.' I've developed a conflict between being jealous of those whose lives are utterly simple, yet I simultaneously want the world at my feet. I've seen people that live for the feeling of a small town, and realized that their efforts for a small stage are just as valid and admirable as any world heroes'. I've realized it's okay to be gooby and gay if it means I'm not taking something for granted. I've realized that 21 years of age is very young, but there is definitely certain things expected of me at this point. I now know that I will get no where by myself, and it's just as important to thank the people that helped me along the way as getting there in the first place. I've realized just how great it is to have a place to call home, and for it to welcome me just the same every time I return.
One last thing, I've realized (many a time now), the more I think I know, the more I have to learn.
But it's times like these that I realize a lot of what is to be learned about life is in places like Oxford. This semester I've learned more about people - their generosity, their tenacity, and their courage, but also about their hollowness, their greed, and their sense of entitlement. I've been trying to think about my undergraduate years in a 'big picture' sense, which is very strange to me right now. It will never be irrelevant, but it is so peculiar to me how much I've learned at a very small, but very special place, in just four years.
I've always said I've learned both good and bad from Ole Miss. Let me tell you, both the good and the bad multiplied ferociously this semester. As one was revealed in someone or something, so was the other. I'm the type of person that likes to see more good than bad, but I also know that sometimes it takes bad to see good. But, as I'm constantly reminded, things, in general, could always be a lot worse.
I guess what I'm trying to say is I've had a heck of a semester. I don't think I really have all that much to show for how I've grown (not physically, unfortunately). I've seen how love is not forever, and much one's capability to truly love is directly correlated to their relationship with God. I've seen people give from the bottom of their hearts. I've had parents basically adopt me this semester. I've seen what family and friends really mean to Southerners. I've seen death take its ugly toll on people who had barely yet lived. I've seen girls at their sweetest and girls at their cattiest. I've seen myself learn true forgiveness, but I've also seen myself develop some callousness. I now know what it's like to break bridges, but make up for it by building multiple newer, stronger ones. I know how important it is to be genuinely thoughtful, only because of the way people think of me. I've learned that my parents have actually stopped calling me out on my mistakes, which is one step closer to what I deem the 'real world.' I've developed a conflict between being jealous of those whose lives are utterly simple, yet I simultaneously want the world at my feet. I've seen people that live for the feeling of a small town, and realized that their efforts for a small stage are just as valid and admirable as any world heroes'. I've realized it's okay to be gooby and gay if it means I'm not taking something for granted. I've realized that 21 years of age is very young, but there is definitely certain things expected of me at this point. I now know that I will get no where by myself, and it's just as important to thank the people that helped me along the way as getting there in the first place. I've realized just how great it is to have a place to call home, and for it to welcome me just the same every time I return.
One last thing, I've realized (many a time now), the more I think I know, the more I have to learn.
Is everything alright?
ReplyDelete